Нарочно не придумаешь

Поделиться107-03-2007 10:22:07

Автор: cyberstranger
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31-03-2007 11:39:30

Actual instructions on the labels of consumer goods

1. On Sears hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping".
2. On a bag of Fritos: "You could be winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside."
3. On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
4. On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestions: Defrost."
5. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box):
"Do not turn upside down."
6. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
8. On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication."
9. On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
10. On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
11. On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."
12. On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: Contains nuts."
13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
14. On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
15. On a Swedish chain saw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."

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cyberstranger
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"You may deceive all the people part of the time, and part of the people all the time, but not all the people all the time." Abraham Lincoln, 16th US President
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Поделиться207-03-2007 10:27:27

Автор: cyberstranger
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Real Advertisements

1. Illiterate? Write today for free help.
2. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once,
you'll never go anywhere again.
3. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard,
meals and smacks included.
4. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
5. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to
travel.
6. Stock up and save. Limit: one.
7. Semi-annual After-Christmas sale.
8. 3-year-old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.
9. Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom
for efficient beating.
10. Dinner special - Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25;
Children $2.00.

To err is human, ehh?

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cyberstranger
----------------
"You may deceive all the people part of the time, and part of the people all the time, but not all the people all the time." Abraham Lincoln, 16th US President
----------------

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Поделиться307-03-2007 10:33:37

Автор: cyberstranger
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The Language Barrier

The nominees for the Chevy Nova Award, named in Honor of the GM's
fiasco in trying to market this car in Central and South America.
"No va" in Spanish means, "it doesn't go."

1. The Dairy Association's huge success with the campaign "Got
Milk?" prompted them to expand advertising to Mexico. It was soon
brought to their attention the Spanish translation read "Are you
lactating?"

2. Coors put its slogan, "Turn It Loose," into Spanish, where it
was read as "Suffer From Diarrhea."

3. Scandinavian vacuum manufacturer Electrolux used the following
in an American campaign, "Nothing sucks like an Electrolux".

4. Clairol introduced the "Mist Stick," a curling iron, into Germany
only to find out that "mist" is German slang for manure.

5. When Gerber started selling baby food in Africa, they used the
same packaging as in the US, with the smiling baby on the label.
Later they learned that in Africa, companies routinely put pictures
on the labels of what's inside, since many people can't read.

6. Colgate introduced a toothpaste in France called Cue, the name
of a notorious porno magazine.

7. An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish
market which promoted the Pope's visit. Instead of "I Saw the Pope"
(el Papa), the shirts read "I Saw the Potato" (la papa).

8. Pepsi's "Come Alive With the Pepsi Generation" translated into
"Pepsi Brings Your Ancestors Back From the Grave" in Chinese.

9. The Coca-Cola name in China was first read as "Kekoukela", meaning
"Bite the wax tadpole" or "female horse stuffed with wax", depending
on the dialect. Coke then researched 40,000 characters to find a
phonetic equivalent "kokou kole", translating into "happiness in the
mouth."

10. Frank Perdue's chicken slogan, "It takes a strong man to make a
tender chicken" was translated into Spanish as "it takes an aroused
man to make a chicken affectionate."

11. When Parker Pen marketed a ball-point pen in Mexico, its ads were
supposed to have read, "It won't leak in your pocket and embarrass
you." The company thought that the word "embarazar" (to impregnate)
meant to embarrass, so the ad read: "It won't leak in your pocket and
make you pregnant!"

12. When American Airlines wanted to advertise its new leather first
class seats in the Mexican market, it translated its "Fly In Leather"
campaign literally, which meant "Fly Naked" (vuela en cuero) in
Spanish.

Unfortunately, in this regard СодБизнесБанк was not alone!

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cyberstranger
----------------
"You may deceive all the people part of the time, and part of the people all the time, but not all the people all the time." Abraham Lincoln, 16th US President
----------------

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Поделиться407-03-2007 10:45:38

Автор: cyberstranger
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В продолжение темы:

Signs from other lands

The following are signs that actually exist at the given location.

Bucharest Hotel Lobby - "The lift is being fixed for the next day.
During that time you will be unbearable."

Leipzig elevator - "Do not enter the lift backwards and only when
lit up"

Belgrade elevator - "To move the cabin, push forward for wishing
floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press
a number for a wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically
by national order."

Paris elevator - "Please leave your values at the front desk."

Athenian hotel - "Visitors are expected to complain at the office
between the hours of ..."

Moscow Hotel - "You are invited to visit the cemetery where famous
Soviet composers, authors and artists are buried daily except
Thursday."

Austrian ski hotel - "Do not perambulate the corridors in the hours
of repose in the boots of ascension."

Swiss menu - "Our wines leave you nothing to hope for."

Polish menu - "Salad of firm's own make; limpid red beet soup
with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let
loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion."

Hong Kong dress shop - "Ladies have fits upstairs."

Rhodes tailor shop - "Order your summer suit because it is big rush
we will execute customers in strict rotation."

Germany's Black Forest - "It is strictly forbidden on our Black
Forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance,
men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married
together for that reason."

Swedish furrier - "Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin."

Japanese detour sign - "Stop: Drive sideways."

Swiss mountain inn - "Special today - no ice cream."

Copenhagen airline office - "We take your bags and send them in
all directions.

Budapest zoo - "Please do not feed the animals. If you have suitable
food, give it to the guard on duty."

Acapulco hotel - "The manager has personally passed all the water
served here."

Japanese air conditioner - "Cooles and Heates: If you want just
condition of warm in your room, please control yourself."

Tokyo car rental firm - "When passenger of foot heave in sight,
tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still
obstacles your passage, then tootle him with vigour."

Norwegian cocktail bar - "Ladies are requested not to have children
in the bar."

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cyberstranger
----------------
"You may deceive all the people part of the time, and part of the people all the time, but not all the people all the time." Abraham Lincoln, 16th US President
----------------

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Поделиться501-09-2008 19:21:52

Автор: Morris
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04-09-2008 23:03:48

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Поделиться107-03-2007 10:22:07

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Поделиться501-09-2008 19:21:52